Remember when I briefly mentioned in my first post about my deathly fear of traveling abroad? Well, thank goodness I took that leap of faith. Otherwise, I wouldn't have had the most life-changing experiences to share with you.
Why was I afraid? Initially I thought because I was afraid to leave my (then) younger children behind for an extended period of time. Then they became 20 & 17 years old. Young adults. I couldn't use that excuse anymore-- and an EXCUSE is just what it was. Clearly, I had to do some self-evaluating and unveil why I felt the way I did!
Here I was-- presented with an opportunity of a LIFETIME to travel abroad for a MONTH! May to June 2015--Italy to France to Morocco to Spain-- incredible, right? My mouth was certainly saying so, but my head was in total opposition. Anxiety immediately set in. The mere thought of leaving everything and everyone I've known would shut all my senses down. Am I control-freak? Too much of a home-body?
I mean, everything about my lifestyle (from home decor to fashion sense) SCREAMS "global/international/worldly", yet my fear prevented me from reaching my dreams--that is, until I had to put my life into perspective.
There were four main reasons I made the leap of faith: my hubby, my children, my best friend, and death. Yes, death.
HUBBY: My newlywed hubby and I hadn't gone on our honeymoon immediately after the wedding (Oct 2014) because he and I both had busy schedules to tend to--until his Paris art show in June 2015! He decided to turn our "skip over the pond" into a world tour! With my heart thumping out of my chest, I totally agreed, all the while thinking, "I have 8 months to snap out of this ridiculous anxiety!" I mean, this is basically my HONEYMOON-- I couldn't bail out on that!
CHILDREN: My children knew how much I wanted to travel, and have been steadfast cheerleaders for me to 'just GO, Mom!' I wanted them to see me conquer my fears and be proud of me, so failure wasn't an option.
((I think part of their declaration had something to do with the fact they'd have the house and car at their full disposal with NO parental supervision!))
BEST FRIEND: My bestie of nearly 25 years said to me (and I quote):
"Its natural to feel nervous and anxious. As much traveling as I have done, it still happens to me very often. Don't stress it. As a matter of fact, every time I would travel I'd get that "this is not a good idea" feeling and literally wanna back out... And 100% of traveling somewhere for the first time. Perfectly normal. And guess what? After I went, I was always happy 100% of the time that I went--despite all of my reservations. So if u are feeling worrisome, just put one foot in front of the other and move FORWARD. You'll be glad u did. The only thing that would be waiting for you in Atlanta is a world of regret. Ahead of you? The world!!"
DEATH: Days before my departure, and still spazing about my upcoming trip abroad, a great friend of mine's life was tragically cut short. Shook me to my core. She was an avid arts activist who was young and vibrant and I simply adored her. All I can think to myself was, "Tomorrow is not promised to me, so I GOTTA pursue my dreams and live life to the fullest right NOW...PERIOD."
So, there you have it.
No holds barred.
Complete vulnerability here. I'm sharing this with you because if I can overcome my greatest fear, YOU CAN TOO. Whatever has you fearful can be conquerable. I promise.
Now, for the good part- the TRAVELS!
Stay tuned and join me as I go down Memory Lane and recap the most exhilarating time of my life...'cuz my passport is LIT :)